started playing WOW --- turns out there are a lot of pictures out there of gay guys holding wow boxes

Vielen Dank.

Ich haben waiting auf eat at Bagel Cafe' auf wie forever! Finally habe auf gestern, es was amazing! Ich had es again das morgen, with Starbucks.
Deutsch has been coming along well, even with the set back of not knowing how to spell anything. I've been leaning the actually speech first and then taking that onto Google translate and leaning it that way till i can actually get a book, or something like that. Doing that seems to be coming along well though i feel i'm still butchering the language, of course...
The job at the cable company seems to be coming along nicely i will be starting Monday!
I went back to Indiana this weekend and it was an okay time, my mom doesn't seem to get to have any time with her kids any more my sis is with her boyfriend all the time, and my brother is away at college. I don't live with her anymore, and i'm sure when i'm not there it doesn't change much in the pattern even if she says it does.
Grandpa is having a bit of a time, he had a moment where he thought i was stealing money from him. REALLY me stealing money from him, i mean if i needed something i would ask my mom or dad... heck even him! Though i understand why he would think that i was paying all his bills and everything while he was gone for months and he has never really had much luck with people and his money everyone has taken something from him since his kids are no longer at home, that has lived with him except for me.. but still hurts you know?
Today i'm just sitting in Starbucks, and there are these ... well gay guys here taking pics left and right and rearranging things. I have to wonder, do they work for starbucks or are they doing this for a project of some sort? My theory is a project. LOL!
I'm trying to figure out what to do today... any ideas?

"The quality of mercy is not strain'd,
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes."

Time Ticks By...

So it has been a little while since I've updated again, I for some reason haven't found a really easy way to do this from like my phone or something so sitting down at a computer and actually just writing this out seems to keep me distracted? Oh well, I will try harder!
Now to catch you up on everything that's been going on I suppose. First off I should say I keep waking up really early in the morning, 3a, 4am, and 3am again things like that I'm not sure why it doesn't seem to have anything to do with the time I fall asleep... weird right?
I've also recently decided that I'm going to try and make more of myself, try and expand what i do what i know and all those things, it may allow me to also make more friends, meet new and interesting people. I figure why not I'm not doing anything with my life i need to get out and actually try living for a change instead of just existing for in existants you are but in doing is when you shall actually and truly live!
In accordance to this, and because i feel addicted to 'forbidden love' a German soap (sad i know but its not like American soaps!) i have decided that i will be learning German and have actually got an audio book flash cards and the like already set out, the wise one is helping me a bit too because she has taken it in high school and she still has the dictionary and all that so it will be easier with written material than just listening! I'm also joining a German meet group off of meetup.com. I haven't gone yet and I'm not sure when the next meeting will be but i saw them one time when i worked at Boston stoker and they seem like an okay group of people! :D
Next I am also looking for other group things to do, I've no idea what they will be yet but i will try and figure it out. I found a paranormal group as well maybe i can bring sugarcreek with me and she and i can have fun there. Not sure if she will really go for it or not though~.
Also in accordance with this new... lets say outlook on life, I've been doing more workout oriented things especially in the morning.
stretches 10 count each (legs, arms, mid body)
Yoga Sun salutation
Crunch 10
reverse crunch 10
Bike Crunch 10
Side 10
Leg circle left and right 10 each
Push ups 10
plank 20 count
Repeat once.
Stretch.
It is really hard actually i feel like my stomach is burning or I'm going to die throughout most of it, but it will be worth it I'm sure! Mom said that it happens to her all the time with the core workouts like that. I have to remind myself those are muscle that really don't get used a lot anymore since I've stopped belly dancing. But i will get my nice tummy back and heck I'll make it better! I've even been eating better fruits veggies and staying away from anything out to eat really and if i do have something out its a healthier choice, though its cause i like it not cause I'm trying to.
I have to wonder about my sudden change in behavior yes, but like i said its cause of the revelation that I'm not really doing much with my life and i should be!
I also joined twiter, which is something i'm getting new to~

anyway live long, have fun and be safe!

nice day

today as a rather nice day, I got a call from Time Warner Cable and I have an interview tomorrow at 2pm at their office. I am to take a test before I go, however for some reason it is not letting me log into it. I will call the lady back tomorrow if tec support is unable to assist me tomorrow by phone to figure out what to do. I really hope i end up getting this job! It wont start till Dec. 13, however it is a nice pay increase and i believe it will be something that I can stick to, and it will not go away. $10/hr + .75 for being second shift = $10.75/hr + commission makes Eros happy!

Also met a nice guy ... snake lets call him, he seems great but i'm not getting my hopes up haha it never ends well......


"its better to be dead"

Time In, Time Out, Time To Go...

Something is odd, or off… You see I think that I am upset, scratch that I know I’m upset. However I do not know what, and I wonder if it has something to do with more than me just loosing my job… maybe it’s because I don’t want to look for another one? Maybe it’s because I really liked it and I just want it back? Like I said I don’t know what’s wrong, maybe it could be that I am running out of friends here. The only one I seem to have any more is the witch, and I barely see her at all. Went to Toledo today to see the tall one, I went home almost immediately because I was just so upset about nothing, I was about to cry and had random thoughts of dyeing, not killing myself but dyeing…
I went and bought groceries today, $37 on pretty much NOTHING! Soup, chips, salsa, powdered doughnuts, juice, and ramen, chicken, and pasta with sauce I can make a few things I suppose.
Smoke has been distant too I haven’t heard form him in like 2 weeks haven’t seen him either. Apparently he has invited his dates to the movies we are going to see this week that we’ve had planned for a while, makes sense huh? 4th wheel really! Maybe that is making me upset is that I haven’t been around people… I’m meant to be around family and things like that.
Either way I need to look for a job again, where is my inspiration! Dear motivation, please send me your greatness!!!


"Reputation is an idle and most false imposition; oft got without merit, and lost without deserving."

To One's Own End

Today has been something of a great jumbled nothing.
I went to bed so later at 11pm, and awoke at 12am, back to bed at 8am then sleep again till 11am ... dog sitting and job hunting online. I need to find one soon. I have 3 months paid ahead for my car payments which leaves 7months left but... still.
Saw the witch today, we had penstation and watched movies. discussed again how we are loosing all our good actors / actresses and none are stepping up to replace them... anyone else notice that?
back home now talking to the morman, she is gaming with me... though i don't seem to be in the mood for it because i feel depressed... -sighs- when my job comes again i will be okay but i can't not stress about it, it is just how i am.

"Like as the waves make towards the pebbl'd shore, so do our minutes, hasten to their end. "

To Begin Again.

So I haven't been writing in this at all, mainly because I had forgotten about it to be honest. But now I have time again and a movie I was watching on Netflix reminded me of blogs, so why not start and actually do it this time?
Sunday I was laid off my job, it’s like the 3rd job I've had this year, I can't believe it apparently I wasn't a match for the job they had me in. I don't even know how that could be I showed up on time, early actually every day, did all the work that I’ve been informed about for the specific day. And I never went into over time. I even took initiative and did things I knew we had to do and I could do without anyone telling me about it, or explaining how it’s done. So I ask you all, why is it that I wasn't suited for that job? Maybe there is something wrong with me, am I cursed to not work a year in a job ever?
Today was something of a moping day for me; I sat at home and ate left over Chinese with my parents' dogs since mom and dad are in Florida I’m watching them. Mom called today to let me know they made it home safe at like 10 something so they were going to bed, last day with the dogs I guess. I didn't tell her about the job loss yet, every time something good happens with her I always seem to have something not great happen to me and I have to tell her while she is being happy. I feel like I am draining away her happiness sometimes...
Saw young Frankenstein today, it was amusing Igor (eye-gore) was the most amusing character, and I still love the quote "could be worse" "could be raining". However, the whole movie I kept having the wily wonka song stuck in my head so it made it rather hard for me to watch the movie altogether.
I believe I am also making my best friend upset with me, and I don't know what to do about it cause I feel I a doing in unconsciously. Hopefully I’ll figure out a way to be there for her and still take care of each other, when she is down or when I am...
I think I’m going to go see the chef this week too, since I do not have work any more it makes it a lot easier... maybe I can find a job up there?
*sighs*
I hope my life straightens out soon because I don't know what I’m going to do if it doesn't...